My Funny Valentine

Love is a peculiar thing. It usually hits you when you’re least expecting it. That’s what happened to me. I was just going about my day to day life when Cupid’s arrow hit me. The person I love can make me laugh when I’m feeling down, and he has given me some of my most cherished memories. If I could spend the rest of my life with this person, I am convinced I would have no more worries or regrets and would eventually die the happiest man in the world. The only problem is that the person I’m talking about isn’t quite a person at all. This special individual is actually an animal and an animated animal at that. And this love of mine is a male, too. He is a male, animal cartoon character. Any guesses? That’s right, my would-be lover and hopeful Valentine this year is none other than Mr. Bugs Bunny.

In most magazine dating guides, humor is always listed as one of the most important qualities in a partner. If your significant other can make you laugh at the end of a terrible day, then you know you can count on them to make you smile on the good days, too. Bugs Bunny does that for me. His cartoons may not be especially varied, but they can always turn my frown upside down. Whether he is running away from nemeses like Elmer Fudd or Yosemite Sam, or if he is arguing about the hunting season with Daffy Duck, his shenanigans never fail to make my day brighter. Humor can sometimes be a complicated thing, but Bugs deals with it in the simplest way possible. He mixes one part sarcasm with one part pop-culture with two parts slapstick and serves up a delicious glass of comedy.

Comedy isn’t the only thing you need in a partner, though. As fun as laughing can be, your partner needs to have a sense of maturity and the ability to grow. Bugs Bunny, while enjoying his standard pranks, still grew into a more profound character. In one cartoon, Bugs Bunny shattered the fourth wall between he (or rather Daffy Duck) and the viewer. This formalist take on a regular Looney Tune cartoon produced something that genuinely stood out. He took a typical, slapstick animated short and transformed it into something more literary; more artistic. In another cartoon, Bugs parodies a classic science fiction story but includes some animation jokes, too. It’s brilliant, and, well, really weird. However, Bugs Bunny’s coup de grace is his short “What's Opera Doc?” This picture combines the humor of Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fudd with the epic music of Wagner. To mix something so juvenile with something so refined yields a unique and spectacular synthesis. This cartoon manages to be funny, strange and poignant all at once. His showing in these episodes is a sign of emotional and intellectual depth that many people in the real world don’t reach.

But as important as intellectual depth is, you have to like who your partner is as a person. I like Bugs Bunny so much that as I’ve grown up I have been discovering how Bugs Bunny has affected who I am as a human being. Certain people have upbringings that make them hesitant to things outside of their social or cultural norm. Because of the limits they have put upon them, these people become hateful or fearful of deviant actions. Bugs Bunny, on the other hand, embraced the different and the risqué. Bugs Bunny never hesitated to dress up as a woman whether its purpose was to sneak by an enemy, to trick a dupe or just for the fun of it. He wasn’t afraid to be who he was. And besides the fearless aspect of his personality, I also respect him for his nonchalant personality. He understands that sometimes his predicaments are beyond him and just tries to survive to the best of his abilities. He hardly gets worked up even in the most tumultuous situations. Bugs just goes with the flow. Does he panic and break down if a giant, red monster is chasing him? No. He gets interesting.

So, clearly, Bugs Bunny must be my Valentine this year. I simply love him too much. He picks me up when I’m down through his gift of comedy. He’s intelligent and bold with his willingness to try new and daring ideas. And he is simultaneously courageous and relaxed in his day-to-day life and other, more precarious situations. He has the world figured out, and with him as my Valentine this year, maybe I’ll figure out the world, too.

Top Five Film Couples

Valentine’s Day is around the corner, and that means it’s time for another holiday themed top five list. My list this month is dedicated to film couples who show an immeasurable amount of love for each other. Sure, there are cinema pairs that are lauded throughout history, such as Humphrey Bogart and Ingrid Bergman from Casablanca, but I’m looking for something more. I am looking for that tangible, undying love in my duos. The couples I have in mind could not be separated by any means, physical or otherwise. Even WWII couldn’t stop these soul mates from being together. So, without further adieu, here is my top five list of film’s most in love couples.

5. John Beckwith and Jeremy Grey from “Wedding Crashers”- The couple in this movie are not romantically involved with each other. However, they are much closer and have a stronger bond than most couples I’ve seen in film. Together, these two infiltrated countless weddings to help each other score with emotionally charged women, and they even penetrated the household of a U.S. Senator to get with his daughters. Beckwith (Owen Wilson) and Grey (Vince Vaughn) were not always floating on cloud nine, but even through thick times they were there for each other. There were countless times where Grey wanted to leave the senator’s house before they were discovered, but he stayed for Beckwith even though he knew it was a bad idea. The movie ended happily with both Beckwith and Grey paired with the women they loved, but a part of me believes that they’d be happier if they ditched the ladies and were just with each other. Trailer!

4. Juniper ‘Joon’ Pearl and Sam from “Benny and Joon”- Crazy people need love, too. And just because they’re crazy doesn’t mean their love isn’t any less strong. That’s the message I got out of Benny and Joon, anyway. Joon (Mary Stuart Masterson) was a mentally ill woman who was taken care of by her brother, Benny. Benny took her to a poker game with his buddies one night, and while he was away from the table, Joon played a hand for him. Benny came back to find out that Joon lost, and as a result of the bet, he and Joon had to take in another player’s cousin, Sam (Johnny Depp). Sam modeled himself after the famous silent film actor Buster Keaton, and it didn’t take long for him and Joon to fall in love. Even with the pressures of society, family and their own neuroses, nothing was able to keep these two apart. Trailer!

3. Alabama Whitman and Clarence Worley from “True Romance”- Love can make you do crazy things, especially in movies. It may cause you to stand outside a girl’s window holding a boombox over your head all night, or it might make you do something a little more drastic, like kill your love’s pimp. That’s what Clarence Worley (Christian Slater) does in “True Romance.” Worley’s boss bought him a call girl, Alabama Whitman (Patricia Arquette), for his birthday, but Worley and Whitman fell hard for each other. They discussed their lives together but realized that while Whitman’s pimp, Drexl, is alive the two could never live in peace. So, Worley went out, and with luck on his side, killed Drexl and stole a suitcase of drugs. And that is just the beginning of Whitman and Worley’s adventure together. With how far they go to protect each other, it’s clear that the love they share is all-encompassing. Trailer!

2. Samantha Barzel and Jerry Welbach from “The Mexican”- Contrary to popular belief, real love is not perfect. Since perfect love doesn’t actually exist, it’s nice to see it in film, kind of like how it’s nice to see giant robots and dinosaurs in film, too. However, when a movie shows us a realistic depiction of love, I feel it’s important to give that movie credit. With that said, I have never seen a truer portrayal of love than in “The Mexican.” Jerry Welbach (Brad Pitt) got into some trouble with a criminal organization of sorts, and owes them a favor. His task to clean the slate with the group is to go down to Mexico and pick up a legendary gun. Welbach’s girlfriend, Samantha Barzel (Julia Roberts), is tired of Welbach doing favors for these people and feels as though Welbach doesn’t actually care for her. However, if Welbach doesn’t go through with the job, then he’ll die. So, feeling as though he has no choice, Welbach goes down to Mexico to retrieve the firearm at the expense of his relationship. However, while he is in Mexico, Barzel gets kidnapped and is held hostage by a hitman. In my attempt make a long story short, Welbach and Barzel end up together because despite their hectic lives and catastrophic personalities, they love each other, through the bad times and the good. Even as crazy as they drive each other, they’ll never reach that point when enough is enough because when you truly love somebody, that point doesn’t exist. Trailer!

1. Mallory and Mickey Knox from “Natural Born Killers”- Good guys aren’t the only people who can fall in love. Often times the bad guys fall in love even harder, and Mallory and Mickey Knox (Juliette Lewis and Woody Harrelson) from “Natural Born Killers” are the ultimate example of that. These two, more than any other couple I know of, have shown the strongest bond to each other. Maybe it’s because they are a couple and partners in crime that their love is so impervious. When you and your loved one are criminals, you have to watch each other’s backs especially so because the law is after you. The kind of strain that would put on a relationship would either break it or make it titanium strong. In this case, it appears to be the latter. Even after being forced apart and locked up in a maximum security prison their love didn’t ebb one bit. If anything it got stronger, and their reuniting was an explosion of emotions. These two have shown the most perfect, passionate love for each other and deserve to top my list. Trailer!